it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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