10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
