butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
