she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Randomize
