Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
