I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
