he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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