I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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