We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I wannas sexs uuuuu
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Randomize