My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
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