you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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