your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
