i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize