I saw his package. It spoke to me.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
