we're blogging at a bar
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
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