hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
