Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
