it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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