I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
She swung at the pinata with crutches
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
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