covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
