That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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