walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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