She said her name was "party"
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Randomize
