Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize