hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Drunk is not a location!
how drunk are you?
Several
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
