if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Randomize
