Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize