The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Randomize
