I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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