ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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