I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize