Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
