When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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