I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
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