Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
