All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
