can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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