Me too!
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Be still, my beating vagina.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Randomize