I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
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