what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
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