absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Boobs are out for the taking
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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