what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
