is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
