North Korea, Best Korea!
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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