I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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