do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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