so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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