But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
