Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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