Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
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